Secret crushes keep things spicy in my marriage

We met when he stopped me on the trail one day to ask what perfume I was wearing. After introducing ourselves, we found much in common and started walking the trail together a few days a

week. Sure, some flirting was involved, but the friendship never exceeded our conversations and the occasional hug. Naturally, Amir took the leading role in many of my fantasies during

masturbation, but I never mentioned him to anyone — preferring to keep his existence a secret. These fantasies offered the same adrenaline rush associated with cheating but without the

actual harm of physically cheating in my relationship. My sex life with my husband had already waned a bit, so having a slight crush on someone new to fantasize about actually helped ignite

a spark in the bedroom. Amir, however, was not a character from a movie; he was a real person — an incredibly attractive one — who made me feel young and sexy again, which also made the

friendship dangerous. But I understood that the fine line between fantasy and reality could never be crossed, so when Amir (also married) suggested we spend more private time together after

our walks, I felt an immediate shift in the friendship. The lines became blurred, and fantasizing about him no longer felt right. I quickly ended the friendship, quit jogging and joined a

gym. I had only been at the gym for a year when my girlfriend convinced me to take the new salsa dance classes they offered. After the first class, I was hooked. I loved the dancing, but it

was the young Chilean instructor who made the class enjoyable. Watching the seductive way he swiveled his hips was enough to make my heart race, and I wasn’t the only woman in class who was

mesmerized by his moves. I became friends with Tomas, but this time I didn’t keep my little crush a secret because Tomas was gay. For this reason, there was no threat of our friendship

overlapping into dangerous territories like it almost had with Amir.